Monday, July 28, 2008

Guilty

Upon picking up my daughter from a sleepover at my mother-in-law's house:

MIL: So, I just need to tell you something that Vivian said to me yesterday, out of nowhere."
Me: Oh, what?
MIL:She said, 'Mommy doesn't love Daddy'. And when I asked her why or what she meant, she said, 'Mommy always yells at Daddy'.
Me: Oh! Uh .. . . .
MIL: So I just told her that sometimes people get frustrated with each other and speak sharply to each other but they still love each other, like when Isaac made her mad, she might yell but she still loved him. That seemed to pacify her. But . . .
Me: Oh, that is terrible. That, uh . . .
MIL: So I just thought you should know. They pick up on that stuff. They know what's going on.
Me: Of course. Yes. Um, thank you for telling me. That is terrible.
MIL: And you know, Isaac said the same thing to me, about 6 months ago.
Me: . . .! . .


It makes me want to throw up, just reliving it now. But I need to. I need to put it here, where I can see it, where I can remind myself to grow up already and stop acting like an idiot. So I give it to you to hold and remember, to throw back in my face if I ever start getting high and mighty again.

God. Am such an asshole.

4 comments:

SUEB0B said...

It is really, really hard to see ourselves as we are.

Issas Crazy World said...

Yikes, that sucks. I feel for you and for Viv. It's not an easy thing to be nice to anyone when you aren't feeling nice. You can try and do better...but don't be too hard on yourself, because we all say things we regret later.

And Amy, you are not an asshole. You are one of the nicest women I've ever met. Truly.

islami sohbet said...

ThanKs a Low..

isimsiz kahraman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.