Thursday, December 28, 2006

H and G*

Hello, my dear wonderful blog friends. You may have noticed that it's been extremely sparse around here since sometime in August. I could blame that on a busy fall--and yes, it has been busy--but that is not the whole truth. The whole truth is that I'm in a bit of a rut with the blog, and I think maybe it has run its course. These last few months, it has felt--dare I say it?--a bit of a relief not to blog every event in my life. Not to experience something and immediately start thinking about how to work it into a post, but instead, just experience it. And I find I am not eager to get back to that place where writing about the experience is almost as important as the experience itself.

Also. I am feeling very uneasy about the things that I have laid out here, in particular the things I have said about Isaac and his intensely sensitive health issues. I need to be more cognizant of him as the person he will become, and I don't want him to find this stuff--or worse, for his friends and enemies to find it--right when we are in the midst of the dreaded teen years. I need to take all those things down. Banish them forever to a locked diary hidden under the mattress, which is where they belonged in the first place.

Lastly. The best, and most unexpected part of blogging has been meeting all of you. I consider many of you friends--good ones!-- and, for a mostly unsociable person, the blog has been a wonderful place for me to meet like-minded people. I will miss that the most, I think. However, you--you wonderful, smart, supportive people--are also part of the problem, albeit through no fault of your own. You see, I can't keep up with it all. I can't read every blog by every person who comments on my site and still take care of my family. There just isn't time. My personality dictates that I visit everyone who leaves a comment here, and also, that I feel guilty whenever I don't have time to leave a comment. This means I have a lot of guilt, a lot of the time, when it comes to the blog. There are just too many of you, writing good stuff.

So. I am not shutting down the blog completely. I will take down the Isaac posts and any others that I think are too raw. But I'll leave the rest up. I'm thinking I'll still post kid stuff over at the family blog, just so I can keep a record of all their cuteness for posterity. Maybe I'll post some of that here, too, but I'm not sure. That's mostly boring stuff for you guys anyway, so what's the point? I do reserve the right to post things here if the mood strikes me--you never know when Lance will start pissing me off again, after all. And maybe in a few months I'll be aching to jump back into blog water. But for the foreseeable future, I'm done.

I thank you, from the bottom of my very humble and faulty heart. You have meant worlds to me these past almost two years.

Oh--I still plan to read your blogs from time to time, so I know how you all are doing. I may lurk more than comment, but I know I'll comment from time to time. And you can always reach me via email.

* From Sleepless in Seattle, remember?

8 comments:

Nancy said...

Oh, how I understand. But it doesn't stop me from feeling sad that we will not hear your voice on this blog, at least for a little while.

We will definitely keep in touch via e-mail, though. DEFINITELY. Since we bonded at BlogHer, you are now my friend for life, so you can't get rid of me too easily. ;-)

Take care of yourself and your family.

ProudMary said...

I totally understand. And although I don't really KNOW you, I feel like I know you through your writing. You can make me laugh or cry simply by what you write.

Best of luck to you and altho I don't post on my blog often I hope you find time to drop by every now and then.

--Mary

Andrea said...

*sniffle*

I'll miss you.

Elizabeth said...

I got the post title, I love Sleepless in Seattle! I understand too, but could you post the URL of the family blog so I can keep in touch? And hopefully I'll see you at BlogHer in Chicago this summer!

Stephanie said...

I want to write you a proper email, but until I get to that let me just say that I will SO miss you here. When I read this post, I cried a little bit because so much of what you say resonates with me, and because so often you have made me laugh. That said, I totally understand your decision to not blog so much. Just know that your absence won't go unnoticed.

Take care!

Jana said...

I totally understand, too, but please don't go.

islami sohbet said...

ThanKs a Low..

isimsiz kahraman said...
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