Greetings from Heaven

This is where I am. It may be the most beautiful spot I have ever traveled to. The weather doesn't hurt, either: clear, sunny, temperatures in the low 80s. I am sitting at my desk in a room that is half the size of my house, looking out over a gorgeous golf course with mountains in the background. I can hear birds and lawn-mowers in the distance. It's unbelievable. Truly.

I will say it has been a little difficult for me to appreciate all this luxury--I keep thinking, "My god, what is this costing?", and "We should be putting this money into the kids' 529s." Sometimes, like when a hotel employee smiles at me obsequiesly as I sip my cucumber water beside the pool, I even feel physically sick.

I have never stayed in a hotel like this--even our honeymoon, which was gorgeous and wonderful, was not quite this top-of-the-line. It's hard not to feel like a misfit among all the tanned and be-jeweled guests, emerging from the spa in their thick white cotton robes.

Because spending money makes me nervous, I ate lunch yesterday at Taco Bell, and today picked up a tostada at the local Mexican joint. I bought several bottled waters and some wine at the liquor store and I'll probably run out and get some chips or something to eat for dinner. Breakfast is included with the room (and is not very impressive: why can't luxury hotels improve their food?) so I am okay ordering that from room service. I can sit by the pool for free (which is what I have been doing all day) and of course walking the property and enjoying the clean air and beautiful countryside doesn't cost a thing. Internet is $7/hour though--so I will no doubt just be typing up a few entries and will have to leave reading your sites until I return to the small small confines of my own house, where the sound of airplanes landing mere feet from my backyard will lull me to sleep. Huh.

Yesterday, my friend Jen came up to join me (the room has two queen beds!), and we went out to dinner at the local fancy restaurant. Jen is engaged to Lance's best friend Del, and needed a break as badly as I did. (Heidi had other plans, the bitch!) As the maitre d' led us to our table last night, I noticed that it was a large table, with room for at least four. Then I noticed the ice bucket and bottle of champagne on the table. Del had called ahead, ordered the champagne, and arranged to pay for our dinner. How's that? Awesome, that's how.

My only regret right now--and I can't really say I have any regrets, looking out at the view, feeling freshly relaxed and easy--is that Lance and I didn't plan this better, so that he could have driven up here to join me for one night, at least. Also, I was hoping that leaving Lance at home with the kids would force a little bit more respect out of him for what I do, but he paid a babysitter to watch the kids last night and went to the USC game instead.

I'm not complaining. From here, it feels like he has plenty of respect.