Sunday, February 05, 2006

Another year gone and deeper in dept

Over the weekend, Phantom wrote a post in honor of her one year blog anniversary. Last week, Raehan held a party in honor of hers. These two women bring so much intellect, humor, and honesty to the "blogosphere", I am thrilled to celebrate their anniversaries with them.

I know the day mine passed, because I started this blog on the one year anniversary of the death of a friend. This year on that day, Lance and I talked quietly about Tim, remembering how cold and rainy the funeral was, wondering what it would be like if he hadn't died, thinking about how thrilled he was to be getting married. I sent his fiance (when do we stop calling her that?) an email, and she replied with some pictures of her new daughter. When I got her response, I remembered, briefly, that it was also the anniversary of my blog.

I meant to write about it. To note it, and celebrate it in some way. But then the next day came, and with it a new set of things to worry about, and write about. So the day passed, and I forgot all about it.

But these other anniversaries got me thinking again. I think it's pretty clear: I love blogging. Blogging has filled a void for me that I wasn't even truly aware existed. I get to talk about myself--something I rarely do in "real life". I get to read about your lives, peer in your kitchen windows and watch how you relate to each other, see what works and why, and apply it with limited success to my own life. I get affirmation when I am doing things right. I get support when I mess up. I get people who laugh with me and understand me and give me advice that really works. I can tell secrets here: admit that I am socially inept, that my husband sometimes annoys me, that I am not a good enough mother, that I am unable to hold a coherent conversation over the phone. And, here is the miracle--you listen. You listen to what I say, you hear me, and you respond.

Over the weekend, I met up with a fellow blogger, MIM. You probably already have her on your blogroll, and if you don't , I suggest adding her immediately. She's funny, she's smart, she's just what you need with your breakfast. MIM has two adorable children, In-fant (age 1) and Tod-lar (age 2.5). As you might expect, these two are extremely well-behaved, charming kids. Isaac and Vivian fell in love the moment we walked through the door. MIM herself is welcoming and friendly, not to mention gorgeous and funny. We had a really wonderful morning, despite the fact that it was maybe 150 degrees outside, and we were dressed in corduroys (it was much colder at my house, a mere 15 miles away--ah, the quirkiness of the California climate.) We went to the local park ,where Tod-lar survived a fall from the monkey bars, we ate lunch together, and we talked and talked. Sadly, we didn't take any photos.

I only met her today, but I have known her, through blogging, for several months. Now, we are friends. Just like that. Just like all of you are my friends. Can you hear how amazing that is? Historically, making friends has been an anxiety-inducing proposition for me, and yet blogging has turned it into something easy and natural.

Most impressive of all, (besides the incredible hotness of MIM's husband) is the fact that I drove all the way to MIM's house and back, conquering no less than SIX freeways, and never once got lost.

Thank you all for helping me find my way this year. I am, always, indebted to you.

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